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Freaky Tales letra
These are the tales, the freaky tales
The tales that I tell so well
I met this girl, her name was Joan
She loved the way I rocked the microphone
When I met Joan, I took her home
She was just like a doggy all on my bone
I met another girl, her name was Ann
All she wanted was to freak with a man
When I met Ann, I shoked her hand
We ended up freakin' by garbage can
The next young freak I met was Red
I took her to the house and she gave me head
She likes to freak was all she said
We jumped in the sheets and we broke my bed
There's another girl, her name is Mary
Talked about sex and the girl acted scary
I heard she was freakin' for my homeboy Jerry
Took her to the house and I popped that cherry
Young and tender, sweet Denise
Get her in the bed and the girl's a beast
I tell you, homeboy, If you get a piece
She only talks about signin' a lease
I met this tender, her name was Lori
And a X-rated movie wouldn't tell her story
She had a twin sister, her name was Lisa
And just like Lori, she's a real dick pleaser
My girlfriend's name was Michelle
Her booty was bigger than a tale on a whale, I freaked her well
Her pussy got hotter than flames in hell
I geed this girl, her name was Tammy
I didn't wanna do it cause the bitch was flammy
She had a best friend, her name was Jane
I pulled to the side and I spit that game
I met a lot of freaks in my lifespine
Freaked one night with a girl named Pam
The very next day I saw her with her man
One week passed and I was in her again
I had an old tender, her name was Janien
She was thirty-two and I was only eighteen
She likes to freak, she's just a fiend
It really didn't matter when I saw her in jeans
I wanna big freak, fat and slobby
I kick on back and I watch her mouth
Two tons of fun, big mama jama
A country-girl from Alabama
I met this feak, her name was Betty
Her pussy got wet and it smelled like death
I was tired as hell, I was drippin' sweat
But I was all up in her tryin' to hold my breath
Bake and shake us, I met this freak in Vegas
She said her name was Donna
She was a built little freak from China
I said I don't pimp or gigolo
I'm havin' so much money that I don't need a hoe
You can break yourself but you can't break me
You never met a player like $hort, baby
I knew a dick sucker named Betty-Jo
Took her to my home and we did it on the floor
The girl got freaky and I tell you more
She was down on her knees beggin' to blow
She's like another freak named Rene`
You get her alone and she'll make your day
Like Burger King, she knows the play
But a freak like Rene`, you can have it your way
These are the tales, the freaky tales
These are the tales that I tell so well
I met this girl, thick as hell
Only sixteen, said her name was Linell
I took her to my house, I could not wait
Her shit was much tighter than Central Safe
Let me tell you this since we talkin' young
I met another girl, said her name was Yvonne
Always talkin' about havin' fun
Once again in the bed I got it goin' on
I'm Sir Too $hort, couldn't be no punk
I try to get funky like female funk
So when you see me comin' or see me goin'
I keep my money, let the hoes keep throwin'
I once met a tender, she did it for free
On the Foothill bust number forty-three
All the way on the back she was workin' me
Had my big beatbox and I was jammin' the beat
I met this freak named Antuinet
Macked on the baby like an ice-cold vet
Everythin' she had is what I get
Cause I'm Too $hort, baby, I don't play that shit
I met another freak, her name was Rita
Baby thought that $hort just might eat her
I told her like this, she can suck my peter
Or even go home cause I knew I didn't need her
Scratched her name off my telephone book
Never again I took a second look
Cause the next young freak, her name was Sharon
She kept lookin', well, I kept stairin'
Baby came through with my homeboy Darron
Her booty was stuffed in the jeans she was wearin'
She never left, he cutted out
I know you all know what I'm talkin' about
There's a freak named Shane, such a sinner
She smokes that pipe and she's gettin' thinner
Shane is cool but her mind is gone
One fat rock and it's goin' on
She had another buddy, came by my place
Thick ass bitch, said her name was Grace
She walked in the door wearin' a lace
She walked in da door working late
You shoulda seen that look that was on my face
She's like this tender named Belinda
Homeboys call her Belinda the Blender
She gave head like she made it up
She was twenty years old with a big round butt
Had a girl slick like olive oil
Her father was rich and the girl was spoiled
When she got mad he blood would boil
But I rapped her all up like aluminum foil
These are the tales, the freaky tales
The tales that I tell so well
Shockedy life, Friday night, it's goin' on Too $hort
Three weeks ago I met this freak
She followed me around like Mary's sheep
I hitted around the corner and when she came
I grabbed her by the arm and I asked her name
She said it was Nina and her man's in Santa Rita
I took her to my home and homeboy, I geed her
Set her on the way the very next way
Playboy $hort was ready to play
I bumped to this girl, her name was Roseanne
We hitted the motel and got it goin' on
Holiday Inn to the break of dawn
When I took baby home, I freaked her mom
I knew this tender named Shanie
I took her to the house and let her freak on me
Baby was a fan, she loved my beat
But I wouldn't raise my leg to let her kiss my feet
I met this freak named Yolanda
Rolled baby doll like a brand new Honda
I was on top and she was up under
The bed hitted the wall and it sounded like thunder
I once had a datewith girl named Kitty
She was so fine with big fat tiddies
All night long she was actin' shitty
So I macked on baby like I was Frank Nitti
There's another girl, her name is Rose
I use to roll baby like brand new Volvos
I never saw Rose wearin' clothes
She's a pent house pet, ready to pose
I was ridin' down the street when I met Janet
Her booty was bigger than the whole damn planet
Ass everywhere, I just can't stand it
Tried to pomit it but I could not manage
I had this freak, her name was Bunny
Said I was the only man who ever called her honey
Everythin' I did to her was funny
I macked on bunny and I took her money
Eight tonight a date with Shirlie
She was really short and her hair was curly
If you saw baby you liked this girlie
She was so fine I went to get her early
Shirlie was freakin' like a girl named Rachel
Her bite was vicious and it sure was fatal
She liked to kiss all on my naval
Those are her lips on top of my label
I knew another freak, her name was Candy
Real big lips and they came in handy
I smooth got worked and it was so dandy
I hooked the brood up with my homeboy Randy
He did me a favor in return
Gave me a lizard, said her name was Laverne
Baby got tossed and I got it on
I grabbed the mic and started to sing my song
My young homeboy heard me rap
And said he had way more freaks than that
So I told him like this: They might be freakin'
But, boy, you never had that T-P-Treatment
Too Short - Letras
- 16 Hoes
- 2 Bitches
- A Pimp's Theme Music
- Ain't No Bitches
- Ain't Nuthin But a Word to Me
- Ain't Nuthin Like Pimpin
- All My Bitches Are Gone
- All the Time
- Analyze the Game
- Anything is Possible
- Baby D
- Bad Ways
- Badwayz: Don't Trust Her
- Baller
- Be My Dirty Love
- Blow Job Betty
- Blow The Whistle
- Bonus Track
- Broke Bitch
- Burn Rubber Pt. 2
- Buy You Some
- Cali-O
- California Girls
- Call Her A Bitch
- Call Me
- Call Me (featuring Lil' Kim)
- Call Me Daddy
- Can I Get A Bitch
- Can I Hit It
- Can't Stay Away
- Can't Stop
- Candy Paint
- Chase the Cat
- City of Dope
- Cocktales
- Coke Dealers
- Coming Up $hort
- Couldn't be a Better Player
- Cusswords
- Dead or Alive
- Domestic Violence
- Don't Even Stop
- Don't Ever Give Up
- Don't Fight the Feeling
- Don't Fight The Intro
- Don't Fuck For Free
- Don't Hate The Player
- Dope Fiend Beat
- Everytime
- F.U.C.K.Y.O.U.
- Female Funk
- Female Players
- Fire
- Freaky Tales
- From Here to New
- Fuck My Car
- Funk Session
- Game
- Gangstas & Strippers
- Get In Where You Fit In
- Get It
- Get Off The Stage
- Get That Cheese
- Gettin' It
- Gettin' Some Head (Shawnna feat. Too Short, Lil Wayne & Pharell)
- Girl
- Givin up the Funk
- Good Life
- Gotta Get Some Lovin'
- Hard on the Boulevard
- Here We Go (J.D. Remix)
- Hoes
- Hoochie
- How Does it Feel
- I Ain't Nothin But a Dog
- I Ain't Trippin
- I Don't Stop Rappin
- I Know You Love Her
- I Know You Love Her (featuring Slink Capone)
- I Like It
- I Luv
- I Must Confess
- I Need a Freak
- I Want to Be Free (That's the Truth)
- I Want Your Girl
- I'm a Playa
- I'm Gone
- In the Oaktown
- In the Studio
- In the Trunk
- Intro: Shorty The Pimp
- Invasion Of The Flat Booty Bitches
- It Ain't Over
- It Don't Stop
- It's A Cold Day (featuring George Clinton)
- It's a Cold Day (The Funk Wit U Nix)
- It's About That Money
- It's All Good
- It's Alright
- It's Alright (featuring UGK)
- It's Time To Go
- It's Your Life
- Just Anotha Day
- Just Like Dope
- Keep Bouncin' (Street)
- Keep Fuckin' Me
- Late Night Creep
- Leave it Alone
- Life is Too $hort
- Little Girls
- LOLLYPOPS
- Longevity
- Mack Attack
- Maggot Brain
- Money In The Ghetto
- Money Maker
- More Freaky Tales
- My Dick, My Sack
- Nasty Rhymes
- Never Talk Down
- Nobody Does It Better
- Nothing Feels Better
- Oakland
- Oakland Style
- Oakland, California
- Old School
- Only the Strong Survive
- Paula & Janet
- Paystyle
- Paystyle (Bosko & Banks Mix Yo)
- Pimp the Ho
- Pimpin' Forever
- Pimpology
- Playa
- Playboy $hort
- Player For Life
- Players
- Pull Them Panties Down
- Punk Bitch
- Quit Hatin' Pt. 1
- Quit Hatin' Pt. 2
- Rap Like Me
- Recognize Game
- Rhymes
- Sadity
- Sample The Funk
- Set Up
- Shake It Baby
- Shake That Monkey (featuring Lil' Jon & The Eastside Boyz)
- She Know
- She Loves Her
- Shittin' On 'Em
- Short But Funky
- Short Dog's in the House
- Short Rap
- Short Short
- Show Me What U Workin' Wit' (feat E-40)
- Slink Capone: Nation Riders
- So You Want to Be a Gangster
- Somethin to Ride To
- Sophisticated
- Step Daddy
- Still Strugglin'
- Strip Down
- Survivin' The Game
- Take My Bitch
- Talkin' Shit
- Tell the Feds
- Thangs Change
- That's Why
- The Bitch Sucks Dick
- The Dangerous Crew
- The Ghetto
- These Are The Tales
- This How We Eat
- This My One
- Top Down
- Triple X
- Way Too Real
- We Do This
- What Happened to the Groupies
- What She Gonna Do?
- What The Fuck You Gonna Do
- What's A Pimp?
- Where They At?
- Wild Wild West
- Yo Neck, Yo Back
- You Know What I Mean
- You Might Get G'eed
- You Nasty
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